Happy Election Day (to those who celebrate).
One has to wonder if Election Day is any more consequential than “National Cook Something Bold and Pungent Day” (which is today), “National Cappuccino Day” (also today), or “National Ashley Day” (Hi, Ashley!). Sure, we can vote, cook something smelly, drink a foamy coffee, or celebrate an Ashley (Hi, Ashley!), but in the grand scheme of things, will it improve our lives?
Maybe if your name is Ashley.
I’m not saying that there’s going to be thousands of voters and vote counters trying to subvert the will of the people to “save democracy.” Obviously. I’m just saying that Joe Biden got a lot of dead people voting for him because they wanted representation, and Gretchen Whitmer will get the robot vote for the same reason. The rise of the machines won’t come Terminator style, not at first.
They’ll do it the old fashioned way, but stuffing the digital ballot box.
Hopefully since Elon Musk is an anagram for Omen Sulk we have a sign that the bots have been sent to their corners to think about what they’ve done. I have no clue. Is it Judgement Day? Not unless the judge is named Ashley (Hi, Ashley!).
Elon Musk is also an anagram of Emo Slunk, which is what many people will be doing after the election results are finalized. Probably on Twitter.
Because everything is so unpredictable, what can we do other than take our cappuccinos and friends named Ashley (Hi, Ashley!) to the voting booths? Well, whatever happens today is likely temporary. All the “MOST IMPORTANT ELECTION OF OUR TIME!” stuff is getting old. Definitely vote. Please vote. And then move on, go home, cooking something bold and pungent for Ashley (Hi, Ashley!). It’s a good day for a nice garlic and onion stew, I think.
Or eat by yourself and enjoy the Lone Musk.
After you’re done eating, make something. Obsessing over exit polls won’t help you, or Ashley (Hi, Ashley!), or anyone else. We don’t need a political shift as much as we need a cultural shift. Even if your contribution never sees the light of day it will change the way you perceive the offers of others. Nothing changes our appreciation of something more than trying it for ourselves. Once you go through the process of writing a novel, you’ll never read one the same way again. Once you cook something bold and pungent, you’ll never order something bold and pungent at a restaurant ever again.
One side has been making the culture for years now, and we haven’t noticed because we haven’t been trying.
Make today the day you try.